ANGER IN THE CHURCH - THE BIGGEST DETERRENT TO GROWTH

ANGER IN THE CHURCH - 

THE BIGGEST DETERRENT TO GROWTH

By Dwight Cunkle

Mishandled anger hinders Holy Spirit in the Church

By this shall all men know my disciples - OR NOT

    A recent survey reported that the biggest reason people do not attend a particular church is the presence of anger among members. On the other hand, goodwill and mutual care and trust are among the largest attractors for those choosing a church family. I believe God doesn't even want to come to church where people choose themselves, their opinions, their pride, their feelings, their programs, etc… over the love of God.

     I can be pretty good at throwing a pity party for one -ME! God interrupted my self-made misery once by speaking something like the following to me:
Do you really believe, “Love never fails”? If so, believe that your and other people’s failures opportune love.
     I had to make a choice—nurse my pride or tend His love. I could get trapped in the mental re-runs of offense or turn this into God’s moment to transform me and possibly others in love and truth. What is God up to???

     “love is not self-seeking, not easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs. is not self-seeking, not easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs...love bears all things.”
 
   Whether I am repeatedly dwelling on my own failure or keeping record of someone else’s, both are failures to love. If I know how to handle my anger constructively I can receive and give love in practical and helpful ways. How will we settle disputes among one another, win the world to Christ, confront evil around us and judge angels  if we can’t constructively resolve anger toward one another???????  

     Some people need to get angry at sin but are passive. In this series I repeatedly have stated that anger has a purpose and can be used positively. God is angry at sin. He judges redemptively-meaning he disciplines us for our own good.  All us are saved by grace from his wrath. Do we show the same mercy to others and seek their good?  Jesus was especially angry at patterns of self-righteousness in religious people. Would he be angry at us?

      Let every man be quick to listen but slow to use his tongue, and slow to lose his temper. For man’s temper is never the means of achieving God’s true goodness. (James  1:19-20)

     Anger used against others is abusive, controlling, full of pride and self-protective. Paul wrote that it is better to be wronged and suffer than be a bad example of Christ to the world? How self-aware am I about my anger triggers? Do I tend to shoot first when I am hurt, feel threatened, disrespected or stressed? Do I listen to others who feel that I am angry or do I insist that I am not angry –boy that works really well, huh?

     Can we  see our body language, tone of voice and words through the eyes and feelings of others? When angry we are not good judges of how we are behaving. Few people have been taught how to make good choices when feeling hurt or wronged. It helps to receive counsel regarding how to speak the truth in love to one another and patiently help work through our blind spots.

     Otherwise we risk getting old alone. We expose ourselves and others to sickness. We are like bad breath to one another and hinder new potential members in the church. Since we will give account to God for our word, let’s expose our anger through confession and the transforming power of God’s love instead of being in denial or stuffing our feelings. It takes Godly love and spiritual authority to become an apostolic community of Holy Spirit.

This is #14 in the series on 

The Anger Trap: How to free ourselves from the frustrations that sabotage life and relationships, 

based on the book by Dr. Les Carter. 

To see the back entries go to Covenantlifechurch.com and click on our blog “Pastor’s Corner.”