Anger Choices Determine My Heritage and Harvest

Anger Choices Determine My Heritage and Harvest

by Dwight Cunkle 

    Sixteen years ago I brought home The Anger Workbook to use in family meetings.

 We still joke about what a disaster it was. However, if I had been able to lead us through the principles of 

managing emotional choices we’d have handled frustrations and relationships better.

     In dangerous or abusive situations, fight or flight is the right choice. However, in most daily life situations 

we can either choose to act out our anger in aggressive and potentially harmful ways; or, we can choose to act

 in assertiveness yet with sensitivity to the other people involved. This choices are rooted in the following: 

1. How we feel we have been treated: Have I been abused, or actually trained how to manage my emotions 

in healthy ways? Either way healing and forgiveness are hard. I can receive mercy and grace by giving it. 

2. How we see others: If pride controls me I may see others or their opinions as inferior to mine. If I feel 

inferior to them I either play the one-up-manship-game, in order to feel better about me, or I may shut-down 

verbally or emotionally. How do I see those who irritate me? Is it my job to “fix” them or their work? 

Really!?!?

3. How we see ourselves: Is my self-worth based in God’s love and purpose for me-that I bear God’s image 

or on my performance? What kind of person do I want to be, regardless of if others actually change?

Exchange Bad Harvest for Good Heritage: God gave His Son because He values us as his sons and 

daughters, regardless of my circumstances and performance. We can bring our frustrations to Jesus at the 

cross, like a bad harvest. In repentance ask for what Christ will say and give in it’s place. (Phil 2 Christ already 

exchanged himself for us and has a better heritage to give). 

This is #13 in the series on The Anger Trap: How to free ourselves from the frustrations that sabotage life and relationships, based on the book by Dr. Les Carter. To see the back entries go to Covenantlifechurch.com and click on our blog “Pastor’s Corner.”